27 Things you learn in the movies
M
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ovies are a great
source of knowledge. We just learn so many things watching a 90 or 120 minutes
of any movie which we would have taken our entire life to learn. God Bless
Hollywood! Because we are learning even
when we are watching movies… Parents hear this!
***This post is not my original creation. It’s, in fact, retrieved
from one of my rarest Laughing Stock Archive.***
Click Here to read another hilarious article:
14 things only a mother can teach
Click Here to read another hilarious article:
14 things only a mother can teach
1. Large,
loft-style apartments in New York City are well within the price range of most
people-whether they are employed or not.
2. At least one of
a pair of identical twins is born evil.
3. Should you
decide to defuse a bomb, don't worry which wire to cut. You will always choose
the right one.
4. Most laptop
computers are powerful enough to override the communications system of any
invading alien society.
5. It does not
matter if you are heavily outnumbered in a fight involving martial arts: your
enemies will wait patiently to attack you one by one by dancing around in a
threatening manner until you have knocked out their predecessors.
6. When you turn
out the light to go to bed, everything in your bedroom will still be clearly
visible, just slightly bluish.
7. If you are
blonde and pretty, it is possible to become a world expert on nuclear fission
at the age of 22.
8. Honest and hard
working policemen are traditionally gunned down three days before their
retirement.
9. Rather than
wasting bullets, megalomaniacs prefer to kill their archenemies using
complicated machinery involving fuses, pulley systems, deadly gasses, lasers,
and man-eating sharks, which will allow their captives at least 20 minutes to
escape.
10. During all
police investigations, it will be necessary to visit a strip club at least
once.
11. All beds have
special L-shaped cover sheets that reach the armpit level on a woman but only
to waist level on the man lying beside her.
12. All grocery
shopping bags contain at least one stick of French bread.
13. It's easy for
anyone to land a plane providing there is someone in the control tower to talk
you down.
14. Once applied,
lipstick will never rub off-even while scuba diving.
15. You're very
likely to survive any battle in any war unless you make the mistake of showing
someone a picture of your sweetheart back home.
16. Should you wish
to pass yourself off as a German or Russian officer, it will not be necessary
to speak the language. A German or Russian accent will do. (It used to be an
English accent for the German.)
17. The Eiffel
Tower can be seen from any window in Paris.
18. A man will show
no pain while taking the most ferocious beating, but will wince when a woman
tries to clean his wounds.
19. If a large pane
of glass is visible, someone will be thrown through it before long.
20. If staying in a
haunted house, women should investigate any strange noises in their most
revealing underwear.
21. Word processors
never display a cursor on screen but will always say: Enter Password Now.
22. Even when
driving down a perfectly straight road, it is necessary to turn the steering
wheel vigorously from left to right every few moments.
23. All bombs are
fitted with electronic timing devices with large red readouts so you know
exactly when they're going to go off.
24. A detective can
only solve a case once he has been suspended from duty.
25. If you decide
to start dancing in the street, everyone you meet will know all the steps.
26. Police
departments give their officers personality tests to make sure they are
deliberately assigned a partner who is their total opposite.
27. When they are
alone, all foreign military officers prefer to speak to each other in English.
Source: Jokes that will offend almost anyone
©LinkinMyth:
Things you learn in the movies
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